The Great Sambini

Last night, while Der and I were in our room putting our sneakers on for a walk, I found Sampson (our 17-year-old putty tat) stalking something.  Aha! We found a lizard tail!  But where’s the lizard? Der and I looked everywhere for the tailless creature to no avail.

We decided to let the lizard find his own way and continued getting ready for our walk, before we left I had to take off my shoe because I had something in it. A tissue for sure. I  am a tissue junky. I leave a trail of kleenex wherever I go.  Not like a Hansel and Gretel trail, but you can always tell where I have been, so it made perfect sense that the lump in my shoe was an AWOL tissue.

I sat down, took off my shoe and shook it out.

Wasn’t I surprised when a disemboweled lizard fell out!

Of course we couldn’t find the lizard!  It was in my shoe! Which was on my FOOT! The WHOLE TIME!

I gasped and burst into tears.

I murdered him.  He thought he was safe.  He had craftily escaped from the maniacal feline by using the old “lose the tail” decoy move, only to meet his demise in my shoe by my, thankfully, socked foot.  Poor fella.  Derek consoled me, reminding me that I had no idea the lizard was in there.

All day today I walked around wearing the “death shoe” thinking what a murdering, murderess I am.

I blame Sampson!  He can’t help himself.  He thinks he is a lion, but we all know the truth.

He is the Great Sambini and he thinks cameras are L-A-M-E and plotting murders is awesome.


Filed under Brain Stew, Petz on Parade, So Random

6 responses to “The Great Sambini

  1. Amber

    This story makes my stomach churn! You know how I feel about crawly, creepy, slimey critters. Bleh!

    I think I would have tossed the shoe….

    • Haha! I am only squeamish about scorps and some spiders. You don’t like cats either so that would have really been a traumatic experience for you.

  2. Mindy Mc

    Literally I am laughing out loud!!! That may be one of the funniest things I have ever heard. All day with the lizard dying/dead in your shoe??? So sorry if I’m being insensitive- not sure how attached you were to the lizard, but that is a damn funny image- can’t get it out of my head now!!!!!

    • Haha! I am so glad I was able to make you laugh! Real life provides the best material. Thanks for reading and especially for commenting. It is wonderful to know who my readers are.

  3. Kelsey

    Better you than me my friend! I can’t even smash a spider or any bug for that matter because of the crunch and/or the way it feels under my feet! This gives me the heebie geebies (that is the technical spelling of that sophisticated word btw)!
    Sorry it made you sad. I would cry too. But you put him out of his misery… He was in your tennis shoe! Pee Ewww!!!:)

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